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1 Chapter Three: The Self in Interpersonal Communication This multimedia product and its contents are protected under copyright law. The following are prohibited by law: any public performance or display, including transmission of any image over a network; preparation of any derivative work, including the extraction, in whole or in part, of any images; any rental, lease, or lending of the program. The Interpersonal Communication Book 11th Ed. The Interpersonal Communication Book 11th Ed. Joseph A. DeVito

2 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon2 In order to have a conversation with someone you must reveal yourself. James Baldwin

3 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Deskripsi  Komponen penting tindak komunikasi adalah self ( siapa kita, bagaimana kita mempersepsi diri sendiri dan orang lain) --  mempengaruhi komunikasi & tanggapan kita terhadap komunikasi  Kesadaran diri merupakan landasan bagi semua bentuk dan fungsi komunikasi  Self -- > konstruk sosial -  kita mengenal diri sendiri melalui interaksi dengan orang lain  konsep diri : apa yg kita percayai dalam dlm diri kita -  memberi pengaruh yg kuat kepada pesan apa kita bersedia membuka diri, bagaimana mempersepsi pesan, apa yg kita ingat.  Berasal dr penafsiran yg unik ttg diri kita, dibuat berdasar pengalaman & reaksi yg diberikan org lain pada kita  Komentar orang lain akan mempengaruhi penggambaran diri, menguatkan/mengubah persepsi ttg siapa, apakah kita Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon3

4 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon4 Self Concepts  Our perception of how others see us  It consist of your feelings & thought about your strength and weakness  Abilities and limitations  Aspirations and world view

5 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon5 Self Concepts  Those physical, social, and psychological perceptions of  ourselves that we have derived from experiences and our  interaction with others”  William De Brooks  ( Hal tentang persepsi fisik, sosial, dan psikologi dari diri kita yang didapatkan dari pengalaman dan interaksi kita dengan orang lain)

6 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon6 Strong self - concepts  They can describe numerious skills,abilities,knowledge, compentencies, and personality character  They think positively about themselves

7 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Self concepts  Kurang pengetahuan ttg diri sendiri  Harapan tidak realistis  Rendahnya penghargaan thd diri sendiri  Pengetahuan menyeluruh ttg diri ( - /+)  Menerima diri apa adanya  Kesadaran yg besar utk mengubah aspek diri yg dianggap merugikan Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon7

8 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon8 Weak self- concepts  They cannot describe the skills, abilities, knowledge, competencies, or personality characteristics they have  They think negatively about themselves

9 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon9  Our family members shape our self – concepts  Self concepts determined by our experience & communication with others, the roles & values we have selected for ourselves, our perception of how others see us, and how we evaluate our selves

10 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon10  We see our selves based on how we think we look and on how we think other see me

11 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon11

12 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon12 Self-Concept  Others’ Images of You  Social Comparison  Cultural Teachings  Your Own Interpretations and Evaluations  Self-Awareness Microsoft Image

13 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon13 Other Images  Charles Horton Cooley’s (1922) concept of the looking glass.  Manusia menaksir dirinya dng bercermin pd bagaimana org lain menafsirkan dirinya/ membayangkan apa yg org lain pikirkan ttg dirinya.  Bagaimana anda mengungkap sikap ramah, assertif, anda melihat pada image diri anda yg orang lain tunjukkan pada anda melalui cara mereka memperlakukan anda &bereaksi thd anda  Significant other-  mempengaruhi pikiran, perasaan & perilaku.

14 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon14  Selft Comparison : You develop your self concept is by comparing your self with other  Cultural teaching: parents, teacher, media, your culture instill in you a variety of beliefs, values, and attitudes.  Self - Evaluation : images of you based on what you do, you also react to your own behaviour; you interpret and evaluate it  Selft- Awareness:The extent to which you know your self

15 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Deskripsi  Mengembangkan konsep diri mll perbandingan dng orang lain ( dng org sebanding) -  supaya lbh obyektif  Orang tua/guru menanamkan nilai, cara berfikir, sikap -  ttg kesuksesan bag mendefinisikan & mendapatkannya  Image anda berdasar pd apa yg anda lakukan, anda bereaksi thd perilaku anda, menginterpretasikan dan memperlakukan -  bag menafsir/memperlakukan membentuk konsep diri  Bohong  salah  menilai sbg tindakan yg salah-  bereaksi negatif.  Self – awareness : akan menentukan standar nilai pd apa yg anda takar/ukur pd diri anda Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon15

16 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon16  Belief: komponen – komponen kognitif dari sistem. Kepercayaan merupakan anggapan subyektif bahwa suatu obyek /peristiwa punya ciri/nilai tertentu, dengan atau tanpa bukti.  Values/Nilai: komponen evaluatif dari kepercayaan yg mencakup (kegunaan,kebaikan, estetika, kepuasan). Bersifat normatif, memberi tahu anggota budaya ttg apa yg baik/buruk, benar/salah, siapa yg harus dibela, apa yg harus diperjuangkan.  World view: orientasi budaya terhadap Tuhan, kehidupan, kematian, alam semesta, kebenaran, materi yg berkaiatan dengan kehidupan.  Attitudes: evaluasi/pandangan ttg watak,sikap, perasaan atau pendirian ttg diri kita, orang lain, peristiwa, ide – ide, atau objek

17 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon17 Communication & self Concepts  Communication affects the self – concepts, and self concepts affect how and what we communicate  The way we perceive the communication, we receive from other has a direct impact on our self- concepts and our subsequent communication

18 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon18 Perception of other’s Responses (P) Self – Concepts (S) Behaviour (B) Actual responses of others (A) Kinch’s Model of the Connection between self concept and Communication

19 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon19 Pengaruh Konsep Diri pada KAP  Konsep diri mrpkan faktor menentukan dlm KAP …….. Setiap orang berlaku sedapat mungkin sesuai dengan konsep diri.  Konsep diri mempengaruhi perilaku komunikasi karena konsep diri mempengaruhi kepada pesan apa kita bersedia membuka diri, bagaimana kita mempersepsi pesan, dan apa yg kita ingat  Kecenderungan utk bertingkah laku sesuai dengan konsep diri disebut : nubuat yg harus dipenuhi sendiri ( Self fulfilling prophecy)  Sukses KAP banyak bergantung pada kualitas konsep diri.

20 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon20 Anak belajar dari kehidupannya  Jika anak dibesarkan dengan celaan ia belajar memaki  Jika anak dibesarkan dengan permusuhan ia belajar berkelahi  Jika anak dibesarkan dengan cemoohan ia belajar rendah diri  Jika anak dibesarkan dengan penghinaan ia belajar menyesali diri  Jika anak dibesarkan dengan toleransi ia belajar menahan diri  Jika anak dibesarkan dengan dorongan ia belajar percaya diri  Jika anak dibesarkan dengan pujian ia belajar menghargai  Jika anak dibesarkan dengan rasa aman ia belajar menaruh kepercayaan  Jika anak dibesarkan dengan dukungan ia belajar menyenagi dirinya  Jika anak dibesarkan dengan kasih sayang & persahabatan, ia belajar menemukan cinta dalam kehidupan.

21 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon21 Self-Awareness  What You Know about Yourself  Affects Self-Concept Microsoft Image

22 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon22 Self-Awareness—Your Four Selves  Open Self  Behaviors,attitudes,feelings,motivation, and ideas --- that you and others know  Type of information: name, skin colour,sex to your age,political & religious affiliations, financial situations Open Johari Window

23 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Deskripsi  Menjelaskan ttg keadaan setiap pribadi dlm hal mengungkap, mengerti diri sendiri maupun org lain.  Mengerti diri sendiri  dpt mengendalikan sikap, perilaku, tingkah laku ketika berhadapan dng org lain.  Daerah terbuka tergantung besarnya dng siapa kita berkomunikasi  membuka diri pd orang ttt, waktu ttt  Makin kecil kuadran terbuka, makin buruk komunikasinya  Komunikasi bergantung pd sejauh mana kita mengenal diri sendiri Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon23

24 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon24 Self-Awareness—Your Four Selves  Blind Self : represent all the things about you that others know but of which you’are ignorant Open Blind Johari Window

25 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon25  Blind Self  Kebiasan mengatakan tahu kan, hidung merah bila marah, sikap defensif  Orang ingin tahu daerah buta -  mendengar ttg diri sendiri, komentar negatif  Tidak jujur dalam menampilkan diri, org lain dpt melihat ketidak tulusan  Hidden self  Orang menyembunyikan sebagian besar dirinya  Overdisclosure/under  Berada pada dua ekstrim : terbuka pd hal tertentu dan merahasiakan pd hal lain.

26 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon26 Self-Awareness—Your Four Selves  Hidden Self : you know your self & of others that you keep secret. Open Blind Hidden Johari Window

27 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon27 Self-Awareness—Your Four Selves  Unknown Self : represent truths about your selft that neither you nor others know. Open Unknown Blind Hidden Johari Window

28 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon28 Self awareness – life position  I am OK – Your OK  I am not OK – You are OK  I am Ok – You are not OK  I am not OK – You are not OK

29 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon29 Increasing Self-Awareness  Ask Yourself about Yourself  Listen to Others  Seek Information about Yourself  See Your Different Selves  Increase Your Open Self Microsoft Image

30 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Meningkatkan self awareness  Dialog dng diri sendiri, siapa saya/ apa kekuatan & kelemahan  Mendengarkan umpan balik  Mencari informasi utk mengurangi daerah buta  Mengamati diri yg berbeda, kita dipandang berbeda oleh setiap kawan, keluarga  Kita adalah semua pandangan mereka itu, penting melihat diri sendiri dari kaca mata orang lain  Memperluas daerah terbuka Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon30

31 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon31 SELF ESTEEM 

32 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon32 SELF ESTEEM  Bagian dari interpretasi/penyimpulan diri  Penilaian secara keseluruhan ttg kompetensi & nilai diri  Penilaian ttg konsep diri ( -) /(+)  Bagaimana orang merasa ttg dirinya  "experiencing" dan "dealing with  orang yang harga-dirinya bagus itu adalah orang yang mengalami proses hubungan yang positif dengan dirinya, punya perasaan positif terhadap dirinya, punya penilaian yang bagus terhadap dirinya (self-concept)  proses intrinsik di mana orang merasa perlu (sadar) untuk menjaga atau menghormati dirinya dengan cara- cara yang terhormat.  Harga diri terkait dengan kualitas emosi

33 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon33  harga-diri itu terkait dengan kepercayaan-diri (self-confidence)  Self-confidence: sejauhmana anda punya keyakinan terhadap penilaian anda atas kemampuan anda dan sejauhmana anda bisa merasakan adanya "kepantasan" untuk berhasil  Self efficacy: sejauhmana anda punya keyakinan atas kapasitas yang anda miliki untuk bisa menjalankan tugas atau menangani persoalan dengan hasil yang bagus (to succeed).  Self confidence ini adalah kombinasi dari self esteem dan self-efficacy

34 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon34 Self-Esteem  How Much Do You Like Yourself?  Attack Your Self-Destructive Beliefs  Secure Affirmation : I am statement, I can statement, I will statement.  Seek Nourishing People  Work on Projects That Will Result in Success

35 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication attack  Mengkritik diri --- kepercayaan merugikan  mbuat tidak produktif  Keyakinan bhw anda sempurna, tanpa salah  akibat memenuhi level yg lbh tinggi, tidak realistis  Keyakinan memiliki kekuatan -  kelemahan : kesedihan, ekspresi, emosi sesuatu yg salah  Keyakinan bisa mengambil tanggung jawab lebih dr orang lain Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon35

36 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon36  Nourishing people  Orang yg positif, optimis dan menghargai  Membuat diri merasa lbh bai k  Secure affirmations  Penegasan pernyataan  Pernyataan yg positif ttg diri sendiri  tindakan postif, kekuatan, produktif, hubungan bermakna  Saya dapat, saya akan mengatakan

37 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon37 Self-Disclosure Communicating Information About…  Your Values, Beliefs, and Desires  Your Behavior  Your Self-Qualities or Characteristics

38 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Self Disclosure  De Vito : bentuk komunikasi dimana informasi ttg diri yg biasanya disimpan dikomunikasikan pada orang lain  Informasi yang diungkapkan bersifat sangat pribadi/personally private Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon38

39 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Dimensi self disclosure  Ukuran self disclosure: frekuensi, durasi pesan2 yg bersifat sc  waktu yg diperlukan  Valensi : kualitas positif dan negatif, mengungkapkan diri dengan menyenangkan/tidak. Kualitas akan menimbulkan dampak berbeda  Kecermatan/kejujuran: dipengaruhi oleh sejauh mana kita mengenal diri kita dan tergantung pd kejujuran  Tujuan/maksud : menyingkap apa yg kita tujukan utk disingkap  secara sadar dapat mengontrol diri  Keintiman : mengungkap hal2 yg intim/impersonal Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon39

40 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon40 Self-Disclosure—Influences  Who You Are  Your Culture  Your Gender  Your Listeners  Your Topic and Channel Microsoft Image

41 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Faktor 2 yg mempengaruhi Self disclosure  Efek dyadik : Self Disclosure resiprokal, adanya saling keterbukaan diri  Ukuran audience : terjadi dlm hubungan dyad (2 orang), mudah menghadapi respon dan reaksi, dapat mengontrol situasi yg berkembang. Jika respon mendukung orang tsb akan terus mengungkapkan diri  Topik : mempengaruhi ukuran dan tipe self disclosure -  lbh suka topik pekerjaan, hobi dari pada mslh seksual/uang  Valensi : kualitas +/-. Self disclosure yg positif lebih disukai daripd yg negatif. Pd awal hubungan hindari self disclosure yg negatif  Jenis kelamin : wanita lbh suka membuka diri pd orang yg disukai, pria pada orang yg dipercayai.  Ras, kebangsaan dan usia : pelajar kulit hitam lbh sedikit melakukan SD daripada pelajar kulit putih, usia lbh suka membuka diri Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon41

42 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon42 Self-Disclosure Rewards  Self-Knowledge  Communication and Relationship Effectiveness  Physiological Health Microsoft Image

43 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon43 Dangers of Self-Disclosure Risks Ahead  Personal  Relational  Professional Microsoft Image

44 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon44 Self-Disclosure—Guidelines  Consider Motivation  Consider Appropriateness  Consider Others’ Disclosure  Consider Burdens Microsoft Image

45 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Petunjuk self disclosure  Mempertimbangkan motivasi dari aspek mitra, kita sendiri dan hubungan. Self disclosure hrs berfungsi positif bagi org lain  Mempertimbangkan ketepatan : self disclosure hrs tetap dengan konteks dan pada hubungan antara pembicara dan pendengar--  apakah tepat bagi hubungan  Mempertimbangkan kesempatan respon yg terbuka dan jujur, hindar self disclosure ketika orang tersebut mengalami tekanan  Mempertimbangkan kejelasan, kelangsungan hubungan --  self disclosure utk menginformasikan, lakukan tahap demi tahap  Mempertimbangkan keterbukaan diri orang lain. Beri kesempatan pihak lain utk secara timbal balik melakukan self disclosure  Mempertimbangkan kemungkinan timbulnya beban Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon45

46 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon46 Self-Disclosure—Responding  Practice Skills of Effective and Active Listening  Support and Reinforce Discloser  Be Willing to Reciprocate  Keep Things Confidential  Don’t Use Disclosure Against Other

47 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Memberi respon bagi pelaku self disclosure  Praktikan ketrampilan mendengarkan secara efektif, aktif, empati, perhatian & pikiran terbuka  Mendukung pembicara sblm dan sesudah self disclosure, bersikap empatik dan jangan mengevaluasi  Memperkuat perilaku self disclosure  Menjaga rahasia -  org mengungkap diri krn ingin anda mengetahui pikiran & perasaan  Jangan menggunakan penyingkapan diri sbg senjata utk melawannya.-  dpt merusak hubungan. Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon47

48 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon48 Self-Disclosure—Resisting  Don’t Be Pushed  Be Assertive in Refusing  Be Indirect and Change Topic Microsoft Image

49 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon49 Apprehension in Communication Defined  Shyness  Unwillingness to Communicate  Stage Fright  Reticence Microsoft Image

50 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon50 Apprehension in Communication  Types  Trait  State  Behaviors Microsoft Image

51 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon51 Apprehension in Communication Influences  Degree of Evaluation  Subordinate Status  Degree of Conspicuousness  Degree of Unpredictability  Degree of Dissimilarity  Prior Success and Failure  Lack of Communication Skills and Experience Microsoft Image

52 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon52 Apprehension in Communication Culture and Apprehension  Varies According to Culture  Intercultural Communication May Increase Apprehension

53 Chapter 3: The Self in Interpersonal Communication Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon53 Theories of Apprehension Management  Cognitive Restructuring  Systematic Desensitization  Skill Acquisition  Prepare and Practice  Focus on Success  Familiarize Self With Situation  Relax Microsoft Image


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