Chapter Three: The Self in Interpersonal Communication

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1 Chapter Three: The Self in Interpersonal Communication
Book 11th Ed. Joseph A. DeVito Chapter Three: The Self in Interpersonal Communication This multimedia product and its contents are protected under copyright law. The following are prohibited by law: any public performance or display, including transmission of any image over a network; preparation of any derivative work, including the extraction, in whole or in part, of any images; any rental, lease, or lending of the program.

2 In order to have a conversation with someone you must reveal yourself.
James Baldwin Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon

3 Self Concepts Our perception of how others see us
It consist of your feelings & thought about your strength and weakness Abilities and limitations Aspirations and world view Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon

4 Self Concepts (Hal tentang persepsi fisik, sosial, dan
Those physical, social, and psychological perceptions of ourselves that we have derived from experiences and our interaction with others” William De Brooks (Hal tentang persepsi fisik, sosial, dan psikologi dari diri kita yang didapatkan dari pengalaman dan interaksi kita dengan orang lain) Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon

5 Strong self - concepts They can describe numerious skills,abilities,knowledge, compentencies, and personality character They think positively about themselves Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon

6 Weak self- concepts They cannot describe the skills, abilities, knowledge, competencies, or personality characteristics they have They think negatively about themselves Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon

7 Our family members shape our self – concepts
Self concepts determined by our experience & communication with others, the roles & values we have selected for ourselves, our perception of how others see us, and how we evaluate our selves Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon

8 We see our selves based on how we think we look and on how we think other see me
Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon

9 Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon

10 Self-Concept Others’ Images of You Social Comparison
Cultural Teachings Your Own Interpretations and Evaluations Self-Awareness Microsoft Image Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon

11 Other Images Charles Horton Cooley’s (1922) concept of the looking glass. Bagaimana anda mengungkap sikap ramah, assertif, anda melihat pada image diri anda yg orang lain tunjukkan pada anda melalui cara mereka memperlakukan anda &bereaksi thd anda Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon

12 Selft- Awareness:The extent to which you know your self
Selft Comparison : You develop your self concept is by comparing your self with other Cultural teaching: parents, teacher, media, your culture instill in you a variety of beliefs, values, and attitudes. Self - Evaluation : images of you based on what you do, you also react to your own behaviour; you interpret and evaluate it Selft- Awareness:The extent to which you know your self Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon

13 Belief: komponen – komponen kognitif dari sistem
Belief: komponen – komponen kognitif dari sistem. Kepercayaan merupakan anggapan subyektif bahwa suatu obyek /peristiwa punya ciri/nilai tertentu, dengan atau tanpa bukti. Values/Nilai: komponen evaluatif dari kepercayaan yg mencakup (kegunaan,kebaikan, estetika, kepuasan). Bersifat normatif, memberi tahu anggota budaya ttg apa yg baik/buruk, benar/salah, siapa yg harus dibela, apa yg harus diperjuangkan. World view: orientasi budaya terhadap Tuhan, kehidupan, kematian, alam semesta, kebenaran, materi yg berkaiatan dengan kehidupan. Attitudes: evaluasi/pandangan ttg watak,sikap, perasaan atau pendirian ttg diri kita, orang lain, peristiwa, ide – ide, atau objek Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon

14 Communication & self Concepts
Communication affects the self – concepts, and self concepts affect how and what we communicate The way we perceive the communication, we receive from other has a direct impact on our self- concepts and our subsequent communication Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon

15 Kinch’s Model of the Connection between self concept and Communication
Perception of other’s Responses (P) Actual responses of others (A) Self – Concepts (S) Behaviour (B) Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon

16 Pengaruh Konsep Diri pada KAP
Konsep diri mrpkan faktor menentukan dlm KAP …….. Setiap orang berlaku sedapat mungkin sesuai dengan konsep diri. Konsep diri mempengaruhi perilaku komunikasi karena konsep diri mempengaruhi kepada pesan apa kita bersedia membuka diri, bagaimana kita mempersepsi pesan, dan apa yg kita ingat Kecenderungan utk bertingkah laku sesuai dengan konsep diri disebut : nubuat yg harus dipenuhi sendiri ( Self fulfilling prophecy) Sukses KAP banyak bergantung pada kualitas konsep diri. Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon

17 Anak belajar dari kehidupannya
Jika anak dibesarkan dengan celaan ia belajar memaki Jika anak dibesarkan dengan permusuhan ia belajar berkelahi Jika anak dibesarkan dengan cemoohan ia belajar rendah diri Jika anak dibesarkan dengan penghinaan ia belajar menyesali diri Jika anak dibesarkan dengan toleransi ia belajar menahan diri Jika anak dibesarkan dengan dorongan ia belajar percaya diri Jika anak dibesarkan dengan pujian ia belajar menghargai Jika anak dibesarkan dengan rasa aman ia belajar menaruh kepercayaan Jika anak dibesarkan dengan dukungan ia belajar menyenagi dirinya Jika anak dibesarkan dengan kasih sayang & persahabatan, ia belajar menemukan cinta dalam kehidupan. Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon

18 Self-Awareness What You Know about Yourself Affects Self-Concept
Microsoft Image Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon

19 Self-Awareness—Your Four Selves
Open Open Self Behaviors,attitudes,feelings,motivation, and ideas --- that you and others know Type of information: name, skin colour,sex to your age,political & religious affiliations, financial situations Johari Window Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon

20 Self-Awareness—Your Four Selves
Blind Self : represent all the things about you that others know but of which you’are ignorant Open Blind Johari Window Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon

21 Self-Awareness—Your Four Selves
Hidden Self : you know your self & of others that you keep secret. Open Blind Hidden Johari Window Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon

22 Self-Awareness—Your Four Selves
Unknown Self : represent truths about your selft that neither you nor others know. Open Unknown Blind Hidden Johari Window Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon

23 Self awareness – life position
I am OK – Your OK I am not OK – You are OK I am Ok – You are not OK I am not OK – You are not OK Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon

24 Increasing Self-Awareness
Ask Yourself about Yourself Listen to Others Seek Information about Yourself See Your Different Selves Increase Your Open Self Microsoft Image Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon

25 SELF ESTEEM Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon

26 SELF ESTEEM Bagaimana orang merasa ttg dirinya
"experiencing" dan "dealing with orang yang harga-dirinya bagus itu adalah orang yang mengalami proses hubungan yang positif dengan dirinya, punya perasaan positif terhadap dirinya, punya penilaian yang bagus terhadap dirinya (self-concept) proses intrinsik di mana orang merasa perlu (sadar) untuk menjaga atau menghormati dirinya dengan cara-cara yang terhormat. Harga diri terkait dengan kualitas emosi Bagian dari interpretasi/penyimpulan diri Penilaian secara keseluruhan ttg kompetensi & nilai diri Penilaian ttg konsep diri ( -) /(+) Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon

27 harga-diri itu terkait dengan kepercayaan-diri (self-confidence)
Self-confidence: sejauhmana anda punya keyakinan terhadap penilaian anda atas kemampuan anda dan sejauhmana anda bisa merasakan adanya "kepantasan" untuk berhasil Self efficacy: sejauhmana anda punya keyakinan atas kapasitas yang anda miliki untuk bisa menjalankan tugas atau menangani persoalan dengan hasil yang bagus (to succeed). Self confidence ini adalah kombinasi dari self esteem dan self-efficacy Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon

28 Self-Esteem How Much Do You Like Yourself?
Attack Your Self-Destructive Beliefs Secure Affirmation : I am statement, I can statement, I will statement. Seek Nourishing People Work on Projects That Will Result in Success Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon

29 Self-Disclosure Communicating Information About…
Your Values, Beliefs, and Desires Your Behavior Your Self-Qualities or Characteristics Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon

30 Self-Disclosure—Influences
Who You Are Your Culture Your Gender Your Listeners Your Topic and Channel Microsoft Image Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon

31 Self-Disclosure Rewards Self-Knowledge
Communication and Relationship Effectiveness Physiological Health Microsoft Image Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon

32 Dangers of Self-Disclosure
Risks Ahead Personal Relational Professional Microsoft Image Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon

33 Self-Disclosure—Guidelines
Consider Motivation Consider Appropriateness Consider Others’ Disclosure Consider Burdens Microsoft Image Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon

34 Self-Disclosure—Responding
Practice Skills of Effective and Active Listening Support and Reinforce Discloser Be Willing to Reciprocate Keep Things Confidential Don’t Use Disclosure Against Other Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon

35 Self-Disclosure—Resisting
Don’t Be Pushed Be Assertive in Refusing Be Indirect and Change Topic Microsoft Image Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon

36 Apprehension in Communication
Defined Shyness Unwillingness to Communicate Stage Fright Reticence Microsoft Image Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon

37 Apprehension in Communication
Types Trait State Behaviors Microsoft Image Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon

38 Apprehension in Communication
Influences Degree of Evaluation Subordinate Status Degree of Conspicuousness Degree of Unpredictability Degree of Dissimilarity Prior Success and Failure Lack of Communication Skills and Experience Microsoft Image Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon

39 Apprehension in Communication
Culture and Apprehension Varies According to Culture Intercultural Communication May Increase Apprehension Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon

40 Theories of Apprehension Management
Cognitive Restructuring Systematic Desensitization Skill Acquisition Prepare and Practice Focus on Success Familiarize Self With Situation Relax Microsoft Image Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon

41 Siapa yang dapat mempengaruhi harga diri saya.
Siapa yang sangat mempengaruhi harga diri saya. Bagaimana orang tua/dosen/teman membantu membangun harga diri saya ? Copyright © 2007 Allyn and Bacon

42 Interpersonal Communication
The Interpersonal Communication Book 11th Ed.